I still remember when thirty was old

A few cards and letters and one long distance call
We drifted away like the leaves in the fall
But year after year I come back to this place
Just to remember the taste

There are things that everyone is good at. Davis’ skills included repressing feelings and guilt, pretending that he was okay when he really wasn’t and work. He had things that he wanted to change about himself and his life. He wanted his wife back, he wanted his child. He wanted the things that he had put off because of this surgery or that one. The trips that should have come, and the words that could have been said. He couldn’t go back and change any of it. He couldn’t change the man that he had been then, but he could change the man that he was now. He could change the way that he put himself in the world and the love that he gave. After everything that he was and he had become, he could look back and though he had regrets about things, it was the sum total of things that showed the man that he was.

He spent his days in the lab and his nights there in the hotel, or in the various bars and pubs here. He was not an alcoholic, it was a good way to get to know the people of the area, learn about the culture, and about the suspicions that they had. It was a good thing in his mind. Because it was always a way that things got better. He had gotten ideas, and clues for something this way before, but it was also a way to form attachments.

That was a dangerous thing to do, forming attachments, and he knew just how badly things could go from here. He knew first hand how hard it was to walk away from someone who you get attached to. He was sure that he would ever stop loving his wife, but he couldn’t be alone forever and it had been a long time. He was just a man, and he got lonely from time to time. He needed the company of someone to make him feel better. Even if it was just talking, even if it was just drinking. He usually woke alone in his bed either way, so it didn’t matter too much did it?

He walked into the bar with a sigh and moved to sit on the bar stool that had helped him do some thinking lately and he toyed with his naked finger. He was getting used to not wearing it now drinking with Murph had helped him see that he didn’t need to linger constantly on things that he could not change any more than it did to try and bring her back to life. He took a deep breath and was about to order a drink when someone spoke to him. Looking over his shoulder he gave a smile.

” Yes?”

tag:@monroe words: 465 template by eliza @ tb & thq

It was no secret that Monroe like going out. She enjoyed being able to unwind. She had been out a few nights already this month and she had told herself that this would be her last night out this month. But maybe she was just fooling herself into being an adult. She had tried telling herself it was time to give up the going out constantly jut then the next afternoon when she would be thinking what to do that night, she would remind herself she was only young once and that it wouldn’t be the end of the world if she went out again. She didn’t always go out with the intention of hooking up but if she did take home someone she found delectable, Monroe considered that a bonus.

She liked being social and was never short of finding someone to come out with her. There were nights she did head out on her own but they were sporadic. Monroe was out with her sister today. Omara was always company and Monroe knew she would appreciate the night off from wedding planning. She was happy to see her older sister settle down. Their oldest brother was already married and he and his wife were expecting twins. Monroe wondered if that was the world’s way of paying back Trent for all the pain he had put their parents through when they were growing up. But really she knew that Trent would be a great father when his twins were born.

Tonight the girls had had dinner and now they were here at the Roadhouse to continue the drinking. Monroe had already told her sister that she could stay at her place tonight so she didn’t have to make the trip back to Nottingham. While it wasn’t that far away, it was still not worth the trip when Omara would have so much alcohol in her system. She wanted her sister to make it home in one piece and even her sister had lost her magic and would likely be using muggle transport methods to get him since she hadn’t driven here. The Levinson’s had learned to drive growing up but they just didn’t. Being witches and wizards they saw little point.

Monroe finished her cocktail and it was her turn to pay for the next round. She strolled up to the bar and saw it was rather busy tonight, she supposed that no one wanted their Sunday night to end. She stood behind an older man whom she knew she had to get past to order her drinks. She turned back to Omara and winked at her before turning back around and excused herself so she could get past the guy and order her drinks. ”Hey I’m sorry, just want to order some drinks” she smiled before looking over at the bartender and ordered two cosmpolitans.

Words: 477