Leave Me To Dream

If August had a list of days he hated today was number two on the list. He was expected to be at dinner tonight. He was expected to celebrate/ Nut he knew what it was going to be like. Him, Hattie, and both his parents in the same room together. It had never turned out well in the past. Why would today be any different? Because his mother said he was doing much better than last year. But she always said stuff like that. She always said his day was better than the last when they see  each other. She was just hopeful and he let her be.

To not think about the mess that supper would be August did his best to keep busy. That simply meant he would go for a run. It had been a long run. He knew that he would be sore. He could not see how one would not be after pushing himself like that. But it was easy to loose track of time when the world around you turned in to a blur.When the only thing that would show to focus was the people and things he would have to avoid. 

Eventually time and lack of energy would catch up with him. His pace would slow and he would walk instead. He cursed at himself for not remembering to bring a water bottle with him. If he had not had to show up tonight he would have located the beach and try too cool down there. But the weather was slowly getting colder. He couldn't show up to his mother's anything but the perfect example of excellent health. He decided to try and find his way out of the park. As long as he didn't get distracted in that time he would be looking for a shop to get water at before he headed to his place to get ready.

Now that he was walking instead of running he was able to take in more of his surroundings. One of those things was the  small spaced out patch of rock that were not too far from the shore. An idea had hit his head. It was rather childish for him to think of doing what he planned but it was his birthday and he was just feeling older. He needed something o make him feel like that wasn't happening. After all, growing up just seemed to get worse and worse.

August squatted down and started looking at the rocks. His hand kept picking different ones up and observing them. If the rock was one that seemed good enough he would trade it to his other hand. If the rock wasn't smooth enough, round enough, or small enough he would toss it lightly to the side. He did this for around a minute. When he decided that he could hold no more in his hand he stopped. 

He was slow to stand up again. He walked slowly, his eyes looking out blankly at the lake. August stopped himself a few feet from the the edge of the lake. His free hand took one of the rocks he had collected. It might have looked like he was about to start skipping rocks but August was never good at skipping rocks. He drew his arm back before throwing the rock as hard as he could out towards the lake. 

The splash the rock had created was what brought a smile to his face. Him and his siblings had done this game when they were real little. The goal was to take the small and smooth rocks that were to fat to skip and throw them into a body of water. Who could take the smallest thing and make the biggest splash? He had won many times. But the game was more fun with someone else.  August held his hand open as he picked another rock. He did the same with this rock as he had done with the one before it. This time with more force in hopes for a larger splash.

tags: OPen
word count: 676

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Everything is better in my dreams

template by Punki of Adoxography

@august - outfit

    Jason had to admit that he was very worried. Things were rather complicated at the moment, but for the first time in a long while, it wasn't he that was in trouble. Now, it was Lord Parkinson, Fer, and Jason didn't really know how to deal with that. He occasionally went to visit his caretaker, in Pyxis, and that was... well, seeing him sick was already troubling enough. Seeing that place, where his friends used to be kept, was also more than a little upsetting. At least Cass always went with him, so he didn't have to figure everything out by himself. That was good, but he found that he was mostly still living by himself now. Fer was sick and had to stay at Pxyis, Juan had gone back to his own apartment -the new one- and both Martin and Amparo were sick and were hiding out in their own places. Well, that was better, really, because he found them to be more than a little bit intimidating. He would have liked it if Cass were still staying at El Aleph, and sometimes he did but not nearly as much as he used to. Jason understood that he was visiting Fer and that he had other pups to visit and look after, and he was also still involved with the redecoration of his bistro. At least he came over for dinner sometimes, the mansion was far too big for him to be alone there. It was unnerving and more than a little lonely. 
    The idea to go and visit his family more often had popped up after the first week of being alone. He had also been seeing some of his old friends, admittedly. Tav was around now, and all other muggleborns that had been released also. Almost all of them had mentioned visiting their families and Jason... well, he saw them sometimes, but not that often. It was still taking him a while to get used to being so different while around them. He couldn't pretend to be the same as he used to be, but he also couldn't explain why he wasn't the same. Still, he thought he ought to visit them more. Now especially. The thing was that his mother's apartment didn't have a floo connection, which meant that he had to floo somewhere else and walk to her apartment from there. That was fine, though. He would go to the Leakey Cauldron and then cross London by foot, he enjoyed walking and he loved the city. It was fine and usually he had enough of the pocket money Fer gave him to get a drink somewhere. Maybe a butterbeer, maybe some tea. As long as he was back at El Aleph in time for his classes with his tutors it would all be fine. Nobody ever noticed he was gone, nobody but the house elves, but he left a note on the living room table just in case. He didn't want someone to come looking for him and then realise he wasn't there, he didn't want anyone to worry about him.
    The park was nice, he crossed it every time he walked to his mother's place. It had been a nice day, they'd had food and tea and his younger siblings had been so happy to see him. If he was being honest, he'd been so very happy to see them as well. Played around, built stuff out of blocks with them, read them stories. It was great. He was also stronger now too, so he could carry a couple of them as they tried to pin him down. Merlin, he'd missed them. They brought a sense of levity to his heart again. Still, eventually he'd had to go. He was crossing the park when he heard splashing- which wasn't all that strange. For all that the park was peaceful there were always a lot of people around. Tossing pebbles into the water wasn't strange. The only reason he could hear the splashing was because Cass had taught him to always be on guard when he was alone in public places. Concentrate on his nose and on his ears and all that. He'd been about to keep walking when a waft of wind brought a familiar scent closer. Well, familiar. It was another werewolf. Not one he'd ever met but by now Cass had taught him to smell wether someone was human or not. Werewolf was the non-human scent he could pick up the easiest. So... well, he turned and got closer, slowly so as not to spook anyone. Until he caught sight of a man, somewhat older than him, tossing pebbles into the lake. As Jason had thought. Shyly, he came closer. "Uhm... hi."

Leave Me To Dream

The major problem with seeing his day later was that he would try to assess the situation and convince August that what will really help him is being with the pack. Hattie was the same way after a full moon. Saying things like everything was easier to deal with when you had others to lean on. He didn't doubt what they said was true. It was probably better to have someone you could relate to but he would never admit that to them. there was also the idea that being part of the only pack he knew meant giving in to the last two people he wanted to really accept help from. 

Hattie made being a werewolf a greater deal than August could possibly see. She claimed as it is a way to connect to family history for them. August saw it as a rather over the top way of doing so. Which is funny to say because until four months after being turn by choice was when he decided that he didn't agree with it all. Really bad timing on his part. Though it was probably just his way to deal what was happening at the time. Maybe this was a talk he should have with a therapist.

Hearing a greeting, August took a deep breath. He knew the scent that flowed through his nose. Werewolf. He let a long sigh out. Will he ever find peace and quiet?  "Hey." He turned to look at the other. He honestly expecting to see someone a bit older. It escaped him that anyone at any age could be a werewolf. "Do you need something kid?" He did his best to not come off at annoyed. He had a habit of being hostile towards other werewolves. He was used to being that way and scaring people off. However, it seemed wrong to be that way right now. 

tags: @jason
word count: 313

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Everything is better in my dreams

template by Punki of Adoxography

@ august - outfit

    The thing with being a werewolf now was that Jason had to learn an entirely new way of living, on top of learning to be a muggleborn in this new version of their society as well. He adapted quickly, though. Mostly because he listened and was quiet and tried to find the most inconspicuous way to get through life. People wouldn't think he was a Gryffindor from looking at him. He was introverted, he was quiet, and he preferred to be at peace with people even if it meant letting himself be pushed around. A bit of a doormat, some would say, but Jason thought that there was some bravery in that. Choosing to be nice, choosing to be gentle, despite knowing that people would not necessarily be nice or gentle in return. In fact, in his position, chances were that they would be cruel. He didn't care, he wouldn't let that change him. He would mind, yes, but it wouldn't make a difference in his personality. 

    In his new position, the best choice would be to mind his own business, keep his head down, and keep going. He had heightened senses now which meant that he could be aware of his surroundings more easily and avoid danger. His wand didn't work all that well and it was useful in most cases- he didn't even have permission to use it outside El Aleph, really. It made him even more vulnerable than he already was. But what had Cassian taught him first of all? Werewolves were supposed to stick together. He was young, still a child, which meant that most werewolves would help him if he needed it. But it also meant that he was part of a community and that he should offer help whenever necessary. So when he came across the scent of another wolf- well, he approached. Only this wolf didn't seem too inclined to make conversation. In fact... he seemed rather annoyed.

    Jason almost stepped back- it was true, he wasn't a brave person and he didn't like bothering others. So he just offered an apologetic smile and shook his head. "No, nothing. Sorry." The man didn't seem angry, just not open to conversation. Jason knew how to read physical language, he'd had too many stepfathers not to. "My sire just taught me to approach when I came across someone. Never know when help's needed, right?" He shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets. Cass had taught him to refer to him as a sire even though he wasn't the wolf that bit him. He was the one teaching Jason how to live with lycanthropy, that was what a sire was supposed to be. He also taught Jason that a lot of werewolves needed help, even today, even when they weren't being hunted down. Jason was just trying to do the right thing.

Leave Me To Dream I wanna dream He wasn't going to hide his feelings right now. He wasn't in the mood to be sensitive to others. He rolled his eyes. Sire, he hated those terms. His father had tried to get Augusremembermeber that his sire was well his father. He would go on about respect not only because he was his father but because he was the one that could teach him everything he needed to know. But what was there to know? What had he not been told all about as he grew up? August had been also told to help where he thought help would be needed. Their kind had to stick together. Whether it was a pack that connected them or just lycanthropy they had in common. But August was selfish most days. He only thought of himself nowadays. He felt as if the world was out to get him. He felt like he was alone. "You listen well." August meant very little by the statement. It could probably be a compliment. He wasn't trying to make it one. "Do you need help?" August wasn't going to be nice here. Help was something he didn't take. Help was something he was not a fan of. If one was just to look at his past and see it would be clear. His head tilted to the side the tiniest bit. "Because the kind of help I need I'm fairly sure you can't help me with." His eyes were cold. Why was he like this? None of this was the other's fault. He felt like he had been cheated out on so much in life. in one night he made a decision that changed more about his life than he was ever prepared for. He was aware of what becoming a werewolf meant. He just had no idea he would never see his brother again. He had no idea that his best friend would leave like that. He never handled things well but his whole world seemed to come crashing down then. A world he hasn't figured out how to build back up. A result of this was him taking it out on others like him or anyone who said the right thing to him. | @ jason | Words: 372 |

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