Post by Deleted on May 23, 2019 22:41:52 GMT -5
And every time we talk
Every single word builds up to this moment
And I gotta convince myself I don't want it
Even though I do
And I gotta convince myself I don't want it
Even though I do
This wasn't happening. He wasn't running late to class for the first bloody time all semester. He wasn't watching that Gryffindor kid take the seat that he'd been sitting in the last couple of weeks. He wasn't just staring at the only empty chair left in their shared Charms classroom. This. Was not. Happening.
Dima could feel the anxiety coiling around his limbs as he gripped tighter on his charms book. He was being cool. He was making his way over to her, head down, nothing was wrong. He wasn't going to die. It felt like he was going to die. It felt a lot like what he imagined having his ribs cut with bolt cutters might feel like, or having someone pour lava directly into his chest. All he could think as he made his way across the room was how different things had been the last time he had sat next to her. How seeing the empty place was common, half expected, and brought a smile to his face.
Now he was trying not to even look at her. Not too much, not too little to make it look like a scene. Just....what was he supposed to say. Honestly he wasn't supposed to say anything. He was supposed to keep his distance. Not talk to her, if possible. How impossible that felt when the girl he was sitting down next to used to be someone he would tell everything to. "Hey." He tried to sound pleasant enough that the listening ears around them wouldn't be tipped off to the fact that this was NOT how things were supposed to go today.
Dima wasn't looking at her. He was trying his best not to but his blue eyes kept boldly dashing to take in a glimpse of her. How long had it been since he had seen her this close? He almost comically thought of asking her. It was hard not talking to her. All he wanted to do was talk to her and pretend nothing had changed. No. He didn't want to pretend, he just.... Nevermind what he wanted. It was empty wishing. It served no purpose. Rearranging his surroundings was a better idea. Opening his book, getting his parchment, and his.... Shit.
His quill and ink were likely sitting in the exact same spot he had left them at the Ministry. So very far away from where he needed them now. Dima drew in a heavy breath. Courage. Composure. Concealing all feelings annnnnd-- "I forgot my quill." He turned his gaze to her apologetically. He wasn't supposed to be doing this. This whole day shouldn't have happened. Easter Break shouldn't have happened. Or maybe they shouldn't have happened at all. "...Do you have an extra one I could borrow?"
Dima could feel the anxiety coiling around his limbs as he gripped tighter on his charms book. He was being cool. He was making his way over to her, head down, nothing was wrong. He wasn't going to die. It felt like he was going to die. It felt a lot like what he imagined having his ribs cut with bolt cutters might feel like, or having someone pour lava directly into his chest. All he could think as he made his way across the room was how different things had been the last time he had sat next to her. How seeing the empty place was common, half expected, and brought a smile to his face.
Now he was trying not to even look at her. Not too much, not too little to make it look like a scene. Just....what was he supposed to say. Honestly he wasn't supposed to say anything. He was supposed to keep his distance. Not talk to her, if possible. How impossible that felt when the girl he was sitting down next to used to be someone he would tell everything to. "Hey." He tried to sound pleasant enough that the listening ears around them wouldn't be tipped off to the fact that this was NOT how things were supposed to go today.
Dima wasn't looking at her. He was trying his best not to but his blue eyes kept boldly dashing to take in a glimpse of her. How long had it been since he had seen her this close? He almost comically thought of asking her. It was hard not talking to her. All he wanted to do was talk to her and pretend nothing had changed. No. He didn't want to pretend, he just.... Nevermind what he wanted. It was empty wishing. It served no purpose. Rearranging his surroundings was a better idea. Opening his book, getting his parchment, and his.... Shit.
His quill and ink were likely sitting in the exact same spot he had left them at the Ministry. So very far away from where he needed them now. Dima drew in a heavy breath. Courage. Composure. Concealing all feelings annnnnd-- "I forgot my quill." He turned his gaze to her apologetically. He wasn't supposed to be doing this. This whole day shouldn't have happened. Easter Break shouldn't have happened. Or maybe they shouldn't have happened at all. "...Do you have an extra one I could borrow?"
Zoe Genevieve Shafiq | Outfit: Ravenclaw Robes | Notes:
MADE BY VEL OF GS + ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0