Thinking back at it, she was already feeling a bit ridiculous that she’d actually climbed out a window. A mixture of stress from having a stalker to begin with, combined with the fact that she knew she’d left Jen to take care of her mother with no help for this long apparently was enough to cause her to think sneaking out of her boyfriend’s apartment through a bathroom window was a plausible option. It would almost be funny, but she wasn’t in a particularly amused mood at the current time. Tatiana had pretty much led Ben to the most personal aspect of her life, and although he was focused on her safety now, she knew he would be turning to his questions about her mother before too long. She had no idea what she was going to say; lying to him and deflecting was getting really tiring, but telling him didn’t exactly sound like the easiest thing to do either. Deciding that there was nothing for her to do until the topic actually turned to her mother, she focused on what she considered a far easier conversation.

Clearly, they had different definitions of cooperation, she mused. Denying them information and being generally challenging to help wasn’t exactly helpful, though for her just asking for help and accepting it was her way of cooperating. While she wanted to bring up that she did answer some questions, she figured that would only further prove his point, “I’ll try to be more cooperative,” she said, grudgingly, unsure how exactly she was planning on doing that. She supposed it was worth a try, if only to help them try to solve this case soon so that they could move onto something more important. Ben brought up a point that she hadn’t even considered, further proving that the stress must be getting to her for her to choose climbing out a window as opposed to just asking Ben to come with her. Tatiana hadn’t known that him waiting outside was an option, and if she had done that, then he wouldn’t be in her kitchen right now, knowing about her mother, “I guess that would have been more logical,” she stated under her breath, pausing to set her drink back on the counter.

She tried to remember that they really needed to solve this, even if that meant her breaking her own rules for a while. It wasn’t as though it was going to be easy for her to actually talk about herself, but she could tell that Ben was relieved by her agreement—so she supposed she’d have to figure it out, “Yes, okay,” Tatiana replied, raising an eyebrow at him. He must have been expecting more of an argument, but when they were in her kitchen with her schizophrenic mother in the other room, she really didn’t have time to argue. Though she wasn’t expecting it, Tatiana let him pull her closer, oddly finding that it instantly helped her to relax, her hands no longer even slightly shaking as she moved them up against his chest. Being this close to him also reminded her that he was still refusing to bloody shag her, which was a frustration she’d yet to solve. She nodded in agreement, hoping that she’d be able to convince herself to leave it at that, but she apparently was still working on her cooperation, “Or we just could now—what’s the worst thing that could happen?” It wasn’t as though she disliked spending time with him at his apartment—she liked it more than she thought possible, but she simply didn’t like the idea of letting this stalker stop them from going on a damn date if they wanted to.

Benjamin supposed this would be something he would make fun of her for later…they would laugh about it, he was sure. Merlin, he was ready to laugh about it now, now growing more amused that she climbed out a bloody window like a rebellious teenager off to see her boyfriend that her father detested. Apparently, she felt that they were acting more like her parents that she had to deceive to get anything she wanted, rather than people who were just wanting to protect her. Maybe they were being a bit stuck up and needed to loosen their grip on her before she went crazy and said something stupid, like wanting them to drop the case or something. Now, whatever questions he had held back before were now resurfacing, wanting to ask her about her mother and her past and how she lived. Though, he supposed he would wait a bit, questioning her casually when they were out of the listening ears, wherever they may be, in the apartment.

The sides of his lips twitched slightly at her word, nodding his head in understanding. “I sure hope so,” he replied, thankful that at least for now, she was seemingly in agreement…even if she was hesitant. It would be a lot easier for him to know how to approach this situation if she wasn’t so bloody stubborn about keeping her life a secret. “Just a bit,” he smirked lightly, his eyes moving over her carefully to watch for her every reaction to try to understand just what was going on in her head. Since she had lived with him with this situation, she hadn’t been talking nearly as much which is what helped him to realize that this was affecting her more than she would let on. Really, it was ridiculous that he even missed her random rambling that she partook in, but he did. Perhaps he’d take her to Fiji after this was all over, enjoying a nice, weekend long date.

Benjamin’s smirk widened as he leaned a bit away from his girlfriend. “Oh, I could think of many things that could be the worst that could happen,” he stated, raising his eyebrows at her. He stayed silent for a few moments before continuing. “Would you like to go on a date?” he conceded, sighing slightly. He supposed they could manage that, hoping that maybe it’ll help relax her just a bit, living a bit more normal.

She knew that she was going to have to figure this out. Ben being here was going to bring up dozens of questions—she was sure that his mind was already full of them. Not only about her mother, but more than likely her father as well, as she recalled her mother making a comment about how ‘they’ had gotten him. Unfortunately, that would not be enough of an explanation for Ben, clearly. After all, ‘they’ had not gotten Tatiana’s father at all, though she was almost glad for that being part of her mother’s delusion, as opposed to her realizing that her husband had left her. Ben would obviously be asking about him, and more about her mother as well, and she was getting to the point where she was running out of reasons to deny telling him. It was an alarming thought indeed, but it simply might just be better to stop hiding.

It wasn’t like she didn’t want to cooperate; she just really hadn’t originally realized just what that entailed. She had known that going to the Auror Office about this situation would mean giving a group of people an excuse to dig into her life and with good reason. She had thought that she’d be fine as long as she decided what she thought they needed to know and what she determined was relevant. But she was starting to understand that that might have only been elongating the process. And Merlin knew she wanted it over, “You’ll see—I’ll be so cooperative, you’ll be begging me to shut up again,” Tatiana told him, trying to continue to convince herself that this was the right move. Merlin, she just bloody hated talking about herself; but she was at least convinced that it was highly unlikely Jack would come up and more than likely, Sarah wouldn’t either. Other than that, she could compromise quite willingly on speaking about anything he wanted to know, “It was a small window too,” she muttered, speaking more to herself than Ben, shaking her head at the thought. Climbing out a damn window.

Tatiana’s smile faltered for a moment at his words, trying to consider what these possibilities were. Her stalker had never done anything in public other than take pictures of her. Were they really to think that he would escalate to a point that anything bad would happen in public? “Like what?” She challenged, raising an eyebrow. She supposed it was rather messed up that she was no longer fazed by the fact that her being in public meant he would be there taking photographs—as that was something that had been happening for so many months that she was accustomed to it. It was only the more personal photographs and the letters that alarmed her. She really wished that she didn’t have to read the letters anymore, more than content with Ben and Potter taking them and reading them themselves. However, Tatiana did know that she might see something in the letters that they didn’t, as only she would get some of the references, “Well when you sound so excited about it, how could I possibly say no?” Tatiana replied, smiling widely. A date would be a nice change from all the crazy, and she was sure that absolutely nothing would go wrong.

Benjamin was trying to focus his mind, tearing it away from the questions that were building about this entire situation. At this point, he would be up all night creating a list of questions to ask her over drinks…as she’d probably really need a drink after every question asked. Well, he’d most likely need a drink after every answer, so there’s that, he thought, slightly amused. This woman standing her in the kitchen was still a mystery to him, though he supposed at times that worked to the advantage as he did rather like to solve mysteries, no matter how difficult. She was stubbornly refusing information, and then she slipped up, letting out more information than she had originally intended. He would think that this was precisely what he had wanted, but he didn’t like seeing her so…frazzled and uncertain. It wasn’t like he wanted to actually force her to give up information. He would just strongly advise it.

“Oh, really? I very much look forward to that, then,” he grinned, really missing her rambling mind with random thoughts. “But I’m not getting my hopes up too high,” Benjamin added on, shaking his head lightly in feigned disappointment. “I’ll be sure to have it widened for your fat arse,” he joked lightly, referring to the window, hoping to lighten the tense atmosphere just a tad.

The Head Auror rose an eyebrow at his girlfriend, shaking his head. “I’ll keep that information to myself,” he stated, as if he would bloody tell her about even more dangers that existed. And really, they weren’t exactly dangers as he was quite confident in his abilities to protect her, no matter what. “That’s my girl,” Ben smirked, “always staying positive.” He laughed before kissing her forehead lightly, pulling away from the embrace. “I don’t want to go too far, but I suppose a date wouldn’t hurt anything except add a few more pictures to our collection. But for now, is that your mother?” he asked, glancing back towards the room they had been in earlier. He really didn’t want to make her leave early from visiting her ill mother, so he supposed he could try to understand enough to stay out of the way.

It was like she could feel the literal seconds ticking by that separated her from the questions that she knew Ben was going to have. The longer he didn’t ask them, the more he was likely to come up with—so at this point, Tatiana almost just wanted to get it over with. She had promised to be more cooperative, so she supposed she’d have to answer whatever it was he wanted to know about. However, she would still hold out hope that he wouldn’t be thinking of some questions—broaching on areas that she really did want to avoid. That was still cooperative, she reasoned; she would be telling him what he directly asked about. But, clearly, she wasn’t the type to just rattle on about herself, so she obviously wouldn’t be willing giving details out unless his questions touched on the subjects. Tatiana would tell him about Jack and about Sarah if it came up, even though it was completely irrelevant to the case; granted, she would probably glaze over the details a bit, but that was still better than nothing. For him, at least. For her, nothing would certainly be better.

“Look forward to it?” She repeated, raising an eyebrow. As far as she was aware, her rambling annoyed just about everybody—including Ben; he was just able to tolerate it, obviously, or he wouldn’t be dating her, “Are you feeling all right? You must be coming down with something,” Tatiana continued, looking him over suspiciously, “You’ll find I’m true enough to my word,” she told him, though she understood why he wouldn’t be getting his hopes up. After stalling any type of personal conversation for this long, it was unsurprising that he doubted her ability to actually talk freely about herself. But she’d certainly try, however uncomfortable it made her, “Thank you,” she laughed, shooting him an amused look, “You never know when I’ll need to use the window for another escape.” Really, she hoped that she’d never have a reason to climb out a window again, still feeling ridiculous that she had come up with the idea in the first place.

Tatiana really couldn’t think of anything that could go wrong on a date, though apparently Ben had some ideas, “Suit yourself,” she said, her mind already moving to attempt to come up with anything bad that could possibly happen. She supposed the bloke was a bit more pissed off than he’d been before, she mused, not exactly pleased that ‘his love’ had moved in with another bloke. The letters had been a lot less friendly, though she almost liked the anger more than the eerie flattery and talk about how much pleasure he could bring her. That was far more uncomfortable than him being pissed off. She sighed, dramatically, trying to pull herself out of her thoughts—as she really didn’t want to be thinking about the letters any longer, “And if it’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that I’m incredibly photogenic,” she joked, her lips turning up in a small smile that didn’t exactly reach her eyes. Merlin, she would be happy when this was over. Tatiana took a breath wen he turned the topic to her mother, finding even the casual question put her slightly on edge. But he was already here, she reasoned, and he needed to know, “Yes, that’d be her,” she replied, warily, also taking the opportunity to glance into the living room to make sure the woman was all right, and unsurprisingly she was still sitting on the chair, staring at the blocked off windows. Tatiana was lucky Selma was calm at the current time, as she was unsure if she could take finally telling Ben what he wanted to know on top of having to calm her down.

Benjamin really hoped that Tatiana would eventually realize that he could be trusted and that just because she was an Unspeakable, it didn’t mean she had to hide EVERYTHING from him. In his mind, their relationship had to circle on trust and he wasn’t really certain how the relationship could continue without it. He was certain that through time, they would work on this trust issue that they both held, he supposed. Benjamin knew that he had his own secrets, but damn it, he had a good reason for his secrets, obviously. He supposed it was possible that she had her own good reasons for keeping things secretive, but that wasn’t the bloody issue at the moment. It wasn’t like he could go around announcing that he was willingly a Death Eater and had tortured and destroyed families just for the heck of it. Yes, he could hardly see that as going well. She’d probably curse him on the spot, but he’d of course have to then erase him from her memories before that happened. Even if he would hate himself for that, he needed to do his part and try to protect innocents from the war that was breaking out.

The bloke let out a hearty laugh, shaking his head lightly. From the start, her rambling had amused him. Of course, it was annoying when he was trying to get information out of her and she was rambling in order to avoid the parts of the conversation she didn’t want. “Your rambling is more natural than you playing a mute,” he pointed out, raising his eyebrows. Her being quiet or giving short responses had been irking him, knowing that that wasn’t her normal personality in the slightest. “True enough,” he reiterated, nodding slowly. “Nice choice of vague wording,” he stated, smirking slightly.

Though he shouldn’t have, Benjamin couldn’t help the smile that fell upon his lips at her comment. “Incredibly photogenic,” he nodded in agreement. She was definitely photogenic, though the pictures definitely didn’t do her justice. She was naturally an attractive woman, he was proud to admit. He wasn’t shallow, but it certainly helped that she was beautiful. The pictures they received were horrible, even if they portrayed her nearly every good side. “Then I’ll take you on a date. This weekend. I can rearrange some things, I think. Want to go away for the weekend?” he asked, smiling at his girlfriend. Perhaps they both just needed to get away and forget about things for a weekend. The others could deal with things for a weekend, he was sure. Right now, his girlfriend needed some attention. By her response about her mother, he knew she didn’t really want to talk about that just yet, so he supposed he could wait…a little bit longer. Though, the waiting would be done soon enough.

Something that she was sure that Ben didn’t and probably wouldn’t understand was that she did trust him. Keeping her life a secret, for the most part, had absolutely nothing to do with trust. Of course, it did on occasion, but really, it came down to not feeling it necessary to get close enough with anyone to put them in a position to deal with the complications of her life. Tatiana felt that she came with a hell of a lot of baggage, and wasn’t sure that she was up to having anyone deal with that other than her. She’d learned to take care of herself, her mother, and any situation that arose—up until now. This had been the first time in a long time that she’d asked for help for any situation, something that already would throw her off; but dating Ben on top of that was making this a hell of a lot more complicated, making it so that she was really unsure of herself almost constantly when it came to the case and their relationship. Tatiana was still trying to convince herself that this was like any other relationship, and that this stalker situation was the only reason that it felt even slightly different, but she certainly didn’t even believe herself. She knew that even after it was over, she would still be feeling the same way about this relationship, and she’d have absolutely nothing to blame it on then.

She laughed under her breath, even though his comment really didn’t amuse her all that much. Over the past few weeks, Tatiana had been trying as hard as she could to act as though everything was normal. That wasn’t exactly easy when she was staying with her boyfriend while getting stalked and having protection around every hour of the day to ensure that the stalker couldn’t get near her. Taking a few vacation days hadn’t helped either, but she had done that as well, knowing that it was driving Ben and Potter crazy that she was in a department that they couldn’t enter—so she’d decided take some time off would at least make things a bit simpler on them, and ease their minds, even though it did nothing to ease hers, as now she had very little to distract herself with. But apparently, even her attempts at acting normal weren’t working, not if he was calling her out for talking way less than normal—something she hadn’t even noticed she was doing, or not doing, she supposed, “Please, I could never be a mute,” she replied, dryly, though she was realizing that he really was quite correct, she simply hadn’t noticed. She would have to make more of an effort to act normal, she decided, knowing that there was no use letting on how much this situation was affecting her.

Joking about the photographs made her feel slightly better about them, but just barely. It had gotten to the point that she didn’t even want to look at them anymore, though they weren’t as bad as reading the letters. It was just incredibly disconcerting, and frustrating, to see different locations he’d taken her photograph without her noticing. She really should bloody well have noticed him by now. She smiled slightly in response, not being able to come up with any clever response about just how photogenic she was. Hell, she’d be content with never having her picture taken again after this was all over. However, her smile widened sincerely at his next words, “Go away for the weekend,” she repeated, liking the sound of that. Getting away from all of this would be a plus, and perhaps her stalker wouldn’t know where they went, giving them some time away from him as well, “Where did you have in mind?” She asked, raising an eyebrow. Tatiana was surprised that he didn’t immediately follow his first question with more about her mother, almost wishing that he would so that she could get it over with. The anticipation of it was only making her more nervous, “She’s a paranoid schizophrenic,” she said, without even realizing that she had made the decision to speak. Hell, she’d just given information freely and he hadn’t even asked her. This was getting ridiculous, “Muggle condition,” Tatiana added, immediately wanting to just bloody smack herself or something. Shut the hell up, she told herself, wondering where the hell the mentality of only giving information out about what he asked went.

Secrets, he knew, would ruin a relationship. It was because of this that he knew that he might eventually have to tell Tatiana, if their relationship progressed, about him being a Death Eater. He might even have to go into details about what he did and to what extent. That was certainly not a conversation he would want to have ever. It sounded miserable already and it hadn’t even started. Every day that he spent with Tia seemed to open up more questions than answers, and Benjamin was running out of places to keep his questions. At this point, he would need to write a bloody book with all of the questions he needed answers to. They would need to sit down for a bloody week to go through them and even then, he doubted Tatiana would even answer half of the questions. Merlin, they would be lucky if she even answered that many.

Her stalker had been becoming more daring and that was his largest argument about going out anywhere. Them leaving could upset too many people, bringing more harm than good. He was nervous that the stalker would do something against her family, even her mother, now. He wasn’t all that certain he was willing to risk someone’s life over a date that could wait. That thought made him wonder why it seemed like Tatiana was ashamed of her life, ashamed of her mother. Perhaps, he wondered, her mother had done something horrible, but her…condition, whatever it may be…caused her to be pardoned. Maybe her mother…no, he really had no idea and no speculations were coming to mind. It was really irritating to him that the case hadn’t been solved yet and there was really no excuse for that whatsoever. Perhaps they had all been too distracted.

“I make no promises,” he clarified, his mind still working through the possibility. He supposed he needed to check a few sources first, hoping that they would come through. Although it sounded like a good idea at conception, the more he thought about it, the more he realized it wouldn’t be wise. Things were getting serious and they needed to end this case quickly which would mean putting all of his sources to work. It would be the safest thing for them to do and he had to keep everyone safe. “I’m sorry…we can’t. That was a bit…immature of me. It’s just not safe,” Benjamin stated, shaking his head lightly as he reconsidered. He was surprised when she answered his unasked question. He nodded once, understanding, though he still didn’t understand why she hadn’t mentioned this to begin with. “You don’t have to say more if you don’t want to,” he said.

The more she thought about it, the less sure she was that going away was actually the best idea. She certainly wanted to—actually, she couldn’t think of anything that sounded more tempting, but she was starting to think there were more faults in the plan that she’d originally realized. Of course, she wanted to get away from her stalker for the weekend, as she always felt him around… except for when she was at Ben’s apartment, but that was an entirely different situation altogether. A break from all that sounded great, particularly because it would lessen the seriousness of their relationship. It seemed they went from their first few dates to temporarily living together while he tried to sort out a situation for her that wasn’t at all easy to sort out. Going away could bring them back to a more normal relationship, even if it did seem that their relationship was anything but normal. However, leaving would leave the work behind as well, and it didn’t really seem fair to leave that on everyone else. Potter was doing enough to help without them disappearing. Tatiana just wanted this over with, and if that meant sacrificing her sanity for a bit longer, she supposed that was what she would have to do. She was just about to vocalize this—minus the bit about her sanity, when Ben spoke again, apparently having come to the same conclusion. “You’re right,” she stated, smiling unconvincingly. Just because they were on the same page about it, didn’t make her any less troubled about it. Tatiana had thought she’d been playing off being fine pretty well so far, but she was starting to think that Ben wasn’t falling for it in the slightest, “Not worth the risk,” Tatiana continued, vaguely, wondering just how much longer she was going to have to live like this. Having Ben around didn’t make it nearly as bad as it could be, making it as easy on her as possible, but not being able to leave his apartment without feeling tense and paranoid was certainly getting to her. She also felt bad by her continued presence at his apartment and the work it was requiring for Ben and his office. Hell, it was pretty much like he was working 24/7, at work, but then he had to come home to it as well. It wasn’t like this was easy on him either.

She was still cursing internally that she had so willingly brought up her mother. He hadn’t even asked her a question—though she was assuming it would have only been a matter of time until he had. She raised an eyebrow as he replied, not at all expecting that response from him. Hadn’t he wanted these answers from her for a month now? She was unsure why he was backing off from them when she had finally relented to talk about it. Tatiana found herself too curious to not call him out on that, “You’re the one that’s been saying all along you need to do know these things,” she told him, furrowing her eyebrows slightly. Absolutely confusing, “Now you have a free pass for questions and you’re backing off?” He probably didn’t believe that she would actually consent to answering his questions, but she knew she would. It was about time she tried to do her part to really help them finish this, having taken up too much of their time already—and she was sure that Ben wanted his apartment back at this point.

Only a few moments later, she glanced back over to check on her mother, jumping slightly when she realized that she was standing in the doorway. “You’ve been talking a long time,” she stated, her hand coming up to grip Tatiana by the arm to pull her closer, “What has he said? What does he know?” She asked, her grip tightening as her eyes moved suspiciously over to Ben. Far too used to this by now, Tatiana didn’t bother trying to pull her arm free, “It takes a lot to plan this sort of thing,” she told her, easily, “If you really want them gone, it will take a bit of time.” Selma’s eyes narrowed, squeezing her daughter’s arm so tightly that Tatiana winced, though she let the woman drag her into the living room. Her eyes moved back to Ben’s, mouthing ‘hold on,’ before turning her gaze back to her mother’s. “We can’t trust him,” Selma whispered, heatedly, her eyes moving frantically about the room, “He only contacted you because he knows you’re weak-willed and he can manipulate you,” she spat, finally releasing her arm to begin pacing again, “I contacted him—I checked him out to your standards,” Tatiana assured, cutting off her mother’s pacing to guide her back over to the chair, “Let me handle this for you, and you just keep listening to see if they find out anything else,” she told her, finally sitting her back down, “All right?” Once Selma had nodded in agreement, Tatiana headed back into the kitchen, running a hand through her hair, “Sorry,” she said, glad that she had almost two decades of practice in dealing with her mother.

Benjamin knew that if they didn’t find the stalker within the next week or so, they would have to be forced to mark the case as inactive and move on to other cases that had begun surfacing. Really, he knew that he couldn’t be ‘wasting’ all of his resources here, taking Aurors away from other important duties when the world seemed to be in disarray. The recommendation would be that Tatiana add some more security on her apartment and be cautious with what she did until things blew over. Sometimes, things did blow over, where the stalker simply found someone else, which still didn’t sit well with Benjamin. He hadn’t wanted someone else to take the attention, either, but wanted this bloke discovered and tried. Benjamin was glad that his girlfriend agreed, not really wanting to get into an argument about it. Staying here was the wisest decision for them to make. He would have to throw himself into the situation and get focused on solving it so that things could go back to normal. As much as he hated to say it, he was really starting to miss the solitude of his apartment, having not lived with someone in many, many years.

“I’m afraid if I ask questions now, they would be offensive,” Benjamin shrugged, really not wanting to voice the questions that had come to mind the moment he realized she was going to visit her mother. Making her upset would make him coming out here all the more pointless. Benjamin had noticed Tatiana’s mother standing in the doorframe the moment she approached, smiling very slightly in her direction. Finally, Tatiana noticed the woman’s presence as the woman gripped Tatiana’s arm tightly, it seemed. The two women disappeared back into the other room while Benjamin waited in the kitchen, trying to sort through his conflicting thoughts. Moments later, Tatiana returned. “No need to apologize about her,” he shrugged, leaning against the counter. “How long did you say that the other woman had before returning?” Benjamin asked, glancing towards the clock. Not much time had really passed, apparently, and they couldn’t just leave the older woman alone.