I'm here in search of your glory
There's been a million before me
_{That ultra-kind of love
You never walk away from}

Things were going pretty good as of late if all things were being taken into consideration. She and Justin had been together for about four months officially, though thanks to their relationship before that, it felt much much longer. She was extremely happy with how things were going but it made her worry just a small bit because she was always expecting the other shoe to drop or for him to change his mind at any time. Though, it was merely because she was scared of things going wrong and the woman that was carrying his child would reclaim him in some way. She had tried to like Cheyenne. She had tried to be nice, and there was nothing for it. The other woman seemed set to hate her and think that Zora had stolen him away from her. Even though it was nothing of the sort. She wished that this could be fixed, but it seemed like there was nothing for it, really. She had been disappointed when she found out about the baby, not in Luxx by any means, but in the fact that it wasn't her.

She hated that the baby that she would be helping to raise ( or so she hoped) was not her own. She loved him though and she was going to stay with him no matter what unless he told her that he no longer wants her. She was so unsure of so many things when it came to them but she was loving the ride and she was never going to question what was between them. He was her world. He was her everything, and she was going to love every single minute they shared together.

Today they were shopping for him a new home since Indy was coming and he would need the room for the baby, she would hate to see him move because he would be so much further away, but they could make it work if he got their floo's connected. She walked through the kitchen and smiled. "That kitchen is gorgeous, though not a fan of the cabinet colors, personally. Though with that island, and the tub upstairs... pretty sweet deal." She said before going into the dining room to look out into the back yard.

tag: @justin // words: 382 // OUTFIT

template by eliza @ TB THQ

If you are ready, so am I

I see it looking in your eyes
That what you want
Is what I want, oh, I believe in us

It was time to get a bigger place. In fact, getting a bigger place was long since overdue. He had been living in his one bedroom flat for two years now. Even the sudden onset of fame hadn't caused him to move, though it did make him a little bit more popular with his neighbors. Suddenly rowdy drunks in the hall at three a.m. was cool and not 'disturbing the peace', which was great. He really liked his living situation but there was no doubt that it was kind of small. Especially when looking at place's like Tib's fuckin' mansion and Zora's gigantic palace. He had never been a person to compare what he had to others, but with a Indy making her slow and steady way into the world he knew it was time for a change.

Indica Mollie Forbes. Man, he was really starting to like that fucking name. They were at the halfway point in this whole pregnancy gig and it had slowly been killing him that he didn't know what it was. He had thought that he could be one of the types to wait until the birth, be surprised and all that shit, but it turned out he fucking sucked at being patient when it came to this. The instant they could find out they had and he had found of that he was going to be having a daughter. Chey's dad had outright laughed on the phone. An ominous laugh, an ominous chortle really. He had told Justin good fucking luck with that, which he could only assume meant he was in for a hell ride as his daughter got older.

When they had told their parents it had been a lot of the same old same old. Have y'all decided if you're going to get married yet? Are y'all going to be living together? Who's last name is that baby gonna have? Yadda, yadda, yadda. It was all kind of funny, but a total shit storm at the same time. He had always wanted a family, his family had wanted him to have a family but... Justin had always wanted to start one the right way. The way he was raised in good ol' Texas. But that wasn't going to happen. 

He tried anyway to make it happen, even though he knew he didn't want it. He had offered for him and Cheyenne to get a place, if they had to. They could do separate rooms, they could get married, whatever the fuck he was supposed to do to make shit right.... Luckily for him she hadn't had her head so far up her ass as he had. It wasn't so much that he had either, but Ed had gotten to him. Her dad, his Aunts, countless other random family members. Fuck, man, the pastor at his grandma's church had called him. He felt....trapped. Confused. Fucking sad, actually. He knew that a life with Cheyenne wasn't what he wanted, but with Indy on the way maybe it was something he just had to do.

Having Cheyenne talk him off that ledge had been a blessing. She was always a lot more stubborn than he was, and that sort of life wasn't something that they had wanted. It wasn't who they were and it took him breaking down about it to remember that. They were Justin and Cheyenne, two wild and crazy fucktards, who had left the states and come to the UK on a whim to start a brand new life. No one could tell them they couldn't back then, and no one could tell them what they could or could not do now. Sometimes it was hard to see that, especially in the eyes of a new musician. 

With his first label everything was planned and he just sort of...followed it. He rode the wave, did as he was told, and let them blow him up bigger than he ever imagined he could be. Things had all become very planned and almost monotonous. Sometimes it was hard to remember that he was an individual and not a fucking musical robot. But he was an individual. Someone with his own wants and needs and fucking prerogative. And having Indy wasn't going to change that; if anything his wild and free attitude was something she could learn from, and that was invigorating.

Justin had felt like he was in a quiet slump for weeks now as he battled with himself over what to do. Finally he had just come to the conclusion that he was just going to do whatever the fuck he wanted. And what he wanted was Zora. It had always been, two years back until now, she was always right there. For the longest time he could play it off like there was nothing but a good shag between them, but that wasn't true. It had been day after day of laughter, and tears, and being there for one another. Finally his heart couldn't deny him anymore and he had caved-- they both had. What he wanted was her. Always.

What he wanted was her as close as possible, not in some flat down the way, but with him. Hell, they practically lived together now, but he wanted more. He wanted a place that was theirs. A place that he could bring Indy home to, where they could raise her in tandem with Cheyenne. Had he told Zora all of this... Fuck naw, man. It was....it was kind of a surprise. One that could go horribly wrong or amazingly well in the presence of a realtor, but he didn't care. His heart had told him this was what it wanted to do, and he was all about it. Whatever it wanted, if it pointed back to her, it could have.

They were a couple houses in at this point; the first few weren't all that he had thought they would be but this place....was fucking sweet. Justin walked through the space with the look of an appraiser valuing art but inside he was just a twelve year old fucking kid ready to pick which room was his. Because he could totally pick, if he wanted to. Because there was more than one here! And the fridge had a fucking ice maker? Good lord, dude, forget about it. "Yeah, this place is fuckin' sick Z--" he said gazing around the space. His feet carried him to the dinning room with her, overlooking a back yard.

He tried to imagine Indy playing in that back yard, or making Christmas dinner in that kitchen. He tried to imagine them here together and he felt a little anxious over whether or not she liked the place. Justin slunk his arms around Z's waist from behind, resting his chin on top of her head. "....What color would you make the cabinets then?" He asked out of curiosity. If he asked her, if this was the place, he'd make it however she wanted. Even if it meant bright pink bubblegum cabinets. Though, he doubted she'd say that.

@zora | Outfit | words:1180

MADE BY VEL OF GS + ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0

I'm here in search of your glory
There's been a million before me
_{That ultra-kind of love
You never walk away from}

House hunting was never anything that she thought that she would be doing. It meant staying in one place for longer than a few months and until two years ago that was kind of what she had done. She would get irritated and pack up and move. It wasn't that it was a bad thing to move from place to place, it meant that she never got bored and that she never grew tired of where she was, but it also meant that she never put down roots. It wasn't like she had anything to hide... well, maybe she did but, she didn't have anything that she wanted to hide from Luxx. He was pretty much the only one that she ever stuck around for. She had not really thought about it then, had told herself that he was just her friend, but now that they were together, she knew that it was because she had had feelings for him for a long time. She just wasn't sure back then what to do about it.

She had always told herself that she was numb from the ventricles down, that she didn't feel anything, and never wanted to. She didn't want to end up like one of her parents; slipping slowly into madness as the obsession with the other slowly overtook her before she died for some stupid reason. Her mother had done it, and her father had been doing it, but then... well... He was killed before he could do anything stupid. She didn't remember much about them. She didn't want to, really. It kept her sane and made her remember that though she had lost the only home that she ever had, there was nothing replacing that feeling of home. Nothing at all ever made her feel the same way as running through her yard and into the house. The smell of her mother's Steak and Ale pie and fresh baked cookies mixing with the smell of the cut lawn and her mother's perfume. Nothing at all ever made her heart flutter like that, nothing but him.

She had broken for a while after losing her magic and being forced to face her feelings for him. She hadn't known that it had been so deep, and she had not known how to handle it; then just as things started working themselves out, Cheyenne as pregnant. It had made her depression so much worse. She tried to not let it show, but she had been forced to up her dosage, and then she had gone to her therapist every day for three weeks and never said a word to him. She didn't want him to see her as weak. She didn't want him to see her as someone who wasn't good enough, as someone weak and not worthy of his love or affection. She didn't want to ever feel that way again, so she sought help. She wanted to get better, but not for him, for the kid.

It wasn't even hers and yet it was already changing her life so much. He would be so far away from her now and it made her anxiety rise like the bile that seemed to be constantly filling her mouth and making her feel sick to her stomach. Leaning her head back so it rested on his chest she looked up at him and grinned. "I mean, they aren't bad, but like maybe a shade darker?" She suggested. That would really make those countertops pop. She made a face and looked around. Dear, Merlin. Mimi ni mtu huyo." She spoke in the language that she knew better than English and then looked back at him. "What do you think?" /div]

tag: @justin // words: 620 // OUTFIT

template by eliza @ TB THQ

IF YOU ARE READY, SO AM I

I SEE IT LOOKING IN YOUR EYES
THAT WHAT YOU WANT
IS WHAT I WANT, OH, I BELIEVE IN US

Justin liked to think that he was a pretty responsible guy. Ok, maybe not actively-- but he could be! He was always one to be down for dumb hi-jinks and bad decisions. Denying that would be completely pointless given the fact that if one waited until, say tomorrow, they'd likely catch him in the act of doing it again. But he had certain levels of responsible-ness. He had never been evicted, for one. All his bills were paid in full and on time. When it came to standard adulting he could do that shit. He could do it all day. And if he had enough coin for some good smoke, he could do it with a smile on his face.

But buying a house... Man, that was some next level responsible shit. That meant a stable place to live, a mortgage, a residence. It was a huge step up from his little ho-dunk one bedroom flat. Everything lately was made of big steps for him. Justin was taking one giant leap into parenthood, a hop into home ownership, and he was wanting to take what he and Z had to another level. 

What she was going to think about that or say he didn't know. Sometimes he felt like she'd roll her eyes at him and ask him what the fuck took him so long. Other times he felt like she was going to go rigid on him and feign death to get out of Actual Relationship Stuff. He understood that, though. There was a lot of life she had lived without someone in it the way she had him. She had been tough through a lot of things. What those things were he still didn't know, but he could tell that life had hardened her in the same ways it had hardened River.

Justin didn't pry when it came to people's pasts. In fact it bothered him when others did. He didn't think that there was any level of comfort that someone could have with him that made him entitled to know their experiences. While he was a pretty open book he knew that not everyone could be that way. And he was fine with that. He always would be, but it made things like this hard when he didn't know what to expect.

He wasn't scared, just nervous, as he stood there with her wrapped in his embrace. No matter what she said they were going to be alright. He wasn't going to stop lovin' on her bitch ass just because she didn't want to live with him. Justin hummed in agreement, smiling down at Z as she looked up at him. "We could paint em black," he joked lowering his tone to as near of a demonic sound as he could, "like my soulllll." Joking, of course. If souls did have a color his was probably more of a cotton candy pink than any shade of grey or black. 

"I think it's pretty perfect. I mean, it's only missing like one thing I would really need--" his words tumbled out casually, despite the nerves creeping up in his throat. 

@zora | Outfit | Words: 522

MADE BY VEL OF GS + ADOXOGRAPHY 2.0

I'M HERE IN SEARCH OF YOUR GLORY
THERE'S BEEN A MILLION BEFORE ME

Taht ultra kind of love
the kind you never walk away from

When she had found out that Chey was pregnant, she was sure that this was over, that he would leave her and she would never see him again. She was certain that the things that she had come to love about her mans was going to be gone now. She was sure that he would be walking out that door and never come back, but he did. He came back time and again and showed her that he did love her. That he wanted this. Even if they weren't what other people called monogamous, even if they were not a traditional couple, they loved each other and it meant so very much to her to know that when she reached for him most nights he was right beside her. He was moving now though, he was house hunting. He would be having a kid soon, and she wasn't going to fit in for much longer. She knew how this worked. It had been like this in foster care. Before Lide there had been a couple who couldn't have kids, the ones who had wanted her but then they were going to have a baby and before she knew it, she was replaced and shipped off, again.

This feeling of never fitting of not belonging was one that she knew too well, one that hung in the air when she waited for the bad news. She had been doing good for so long but she already knew the words he would say, and then things that she would in turn and then it would be done. She would be left to walk away, again, with her shattered heart in her hands. She had never let herself love before Luxx because she knew that when she did she would just get hurt over and over again. She would just have to say goodbye to someone else. She didn't want that. She didn't need that on her heart. She had too many scars on it as it were, and adding to the pile would just make it worse. She didn't let it show though, or she tried not to. She didn't want him to know what she was thinking and she was more than glad that he could not read her mind since he would have known her fears long before now.

Z loved it when he hugged her tight like this though when he almost engulfed her small frame with his larger one. She liked it when she felt like he could protect her from all of the bad things that had happened to her, even if he had no idea what had happened to her in most of her life. So much of it, she kept to herself, she kept so much of the pain quiet, not wanting to change the way that he ha thought of her. She did not want him to think of her in any ill fashion. She laughed at him and shook her head. "Nah, not black. That is too stark a contrast. Maybe a like seafoam grey or some shit. Something grey with some blue tints. or something. " She said thoughtfully, trying to not think of what could and probably would go wrong here and instead focused on the American who had his arms around her.

He said that he was missing the one thing and she scoffed. "Oh, mate I already thought of that. The built in there has a spot that rolls out into like a butlers cart and it's short enough to be perfect for a rolling table!"

tag: @justin words: 598 template by eliza @ tb & thq